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BOOK WANDSWORTH HOTELS

Jo Brand Quotes

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'Anything is good if it's made of chocolate.'

'People say you should read your criticism because it will make you a better person but it doesn't. It just makes you a sad bitter old showbiz nightmare'

'With two small children, I haven't had a wash since 2001 so the chance to go shopping is way down the list. It is something I do intend to get'

'Bexhill on Sea is a peck on the cheek: Hastings is a lolloping tongue down the throat'

'Bexhill on Sea is a peck on the cheek whilst Hastings is a lolloping tongue down the throat'

'My favorite sexual fantasy is smearing my body in chocolate and being left alone in a room to eat it'

'When I was a nurse my favourite assignment was the anorexia ward. I sometimes had 17 dinners'

'A woman that does a mans work is just a lazy cow'

'The way to tell if a man is sexually excited is to check if he is breathing'

'Andrew Marr looks like Martin Clunes with a little of the air let out of him'

Born in Wandsworth, London
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Why buy a book when you can join a library - Ricky Gervais
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On this day:
St Augustine Introduces Julian Calendar to England - 0597, William the Conqueror crowned - 1066, Domesday Book Commissioned - 1085, First Christmas Tree in Britain - 1800, Mrs Beeton Published - 1861, End of the Soviet Union - 1991
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